When I said on my Facebook I'm like an awkward teenager at Social Functions; I wasn't kidding....
I said remark right after attending a Press Conference with my boss at one of those Celebrity studded Charity Event organized by an ex-Beauty Pageant! Eeekkk ! I told myself "Ok, Let's do this! Let's slap some make up on and dress decently!" Who am I kidding right ??
To start with, my car battery died on me that moment I was all dressed and ready to go. So, I had to walk out to the main road to hitch a cab, which means, no heels! I actually went to the Event in my sandals!! Gaaahhh!!!
My second Gaaahhh came when the Organizer, a stylish and good looking guy came out to greet me; I was happy to just shake hands saying "Hi!! How are you ?!" but he leaned and did the greeting peck thingy which I always had a problem with... I had read about kiss-greeting Etiquettes thingy and some say the lips never touch the face and although some peck on one side of the cheek, most people do both cheeks... The left cheek went fine but my awkward movements made me slam my face to he's right cheek !! Argghhh!! I hope he's jaw didn't hurt !! 8-| Oh Gawd....
A little red-faced, I sat there feeling so small, watching all the Beautiful, tall, graceful Models/ Actresses / Socialites giggle, greet each other with pecks on the cheek, take photos and flit about like little butterflies....
How Obama & Hillary does it....
... How Alicia Keys & whatshisface does it....
Sarkozy ?.....
Let's not do it the Doggie-way.... !
Working in an NGO, I realized I've developed, unconsciously, the habit of under-dressing for any occasion. Yes, I'm guilty of wearing tank tops and shorts to work and sometimes not even putting make-up for meetings! *sigh*
Years of low self esteem only made it worse for me. I grew up pretty much convinced I wouldn't excel in anything, and let's not even start about how I feel about my own looks! Although, friends keep telling me how everyone has some bit of insecurity in them, yeah maybe... Possibly in different scales...?
When it comes to contact, I maintain a healthy distance from people. I mean physical distance. Any people in their right mind would keep their hands to themselves right ? Funnily, I've also met some people with habits of making any form of physical contact while talking ie: touching hands, thighs or slapping some part of other person's body part etc which is ok if it is a close friend but there are people who have no qualms touching a stranger.
It could be the person is plain "Ham Sup" (pervert) or probably just lacks Social skills...
It could also be an act of invading a person's Personal Space. I remember reading the book Body Language by Allan Pease and he explained in this book that the distance of 46cm to 1.2m is your Personal Zone, which anything nearer than that is your Intimate Zone. Therefore anyone coming that close within that proximity is in fact, in an Intimate Zone with you! Which would be fine is it is somebody familiar, if it were not, it'd be sexual harassment...
Also interesting is the fact that Cultural factors do affect Zones Distance; A city dweller is said to have a smaller Intimate Zone as compared to a rural Country dweller! For example if you were to observe an American and a Japanese having a discussion, the American would tend to lean closer whereas the Japanese would take a step back and keep a distance.
Consciously or unconsciously, there are a lot of people who have not read of such things yet are aware of such knowledge by instinct. Which suprises me how some people can be so pushy and invade a persons' Intimate Zone.
So, if you do meet me one day and if I did not lean forward to give you a peck on the cheek, please don't think I'm uptight or being a Snob.. I simply just respect your Personal Zone !!
It could be the person is plain "Ham Sup" (pervert) or probably just lacks Social skills...
It could also be an act of invading a person's Personal Space. I remember reading the book Body Language by Allan Pease and he explained in this book that the distance of 46cm to 1.2m is your Personal Zone, which anything nearer than that is your Intimate Zone. Therefore anyone coming that close within that proximity is in fact, in an Intimate Zone with you! Which would be fine is it is somebody familiar, if it were not, it'd be sexual harassment...
Also interesting is the fact that Cultural factors do affect Zones Distance; A city dweller is said to have a smaller Intimate Zone as compared to a rural Country dweller! For example if you were to observe an American and a Japanese having a discussion, the American would tend to lean closer whereas the Japanese would take a step back and keep a distance.
Consciously or unconsciously, there are a lot of people who have not read of such things yet are aware of such knowledge by instinct. Which suprises me how some people can be so pushy and invade a persons' Intimate Zone.
So, if you do meet me one day and if I did not lean forward to give you a peck on the cheek, please don't think I'm uptight or being a Snob.. I simply just respect your Personal Zone !!
1 comment:
Aaah, Nic, we love you the way you are! Tank top, shorts, sandals and all! That's what makes you, YOU! Sheesh, I underdress for special occasions too. I turn up for charity functions in jeans and trainers when everyone else is dressed to the nines. As for low self-esteem, I think all of us feel that way more often than we would like to admit. I know a model who graced an MNS event whose command of English was so poor that we couldn't help tittering behind her back. We didn't mean to be spiteful. We were just surprised and amused by her godawful pronunciation. She went very quiet as a result. Poor thing, we hadn't meant to hurt her feelings. Proof that not even long legs, fake tan and 1-foot long eyelashes can protect you from social gaffes!
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